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<blockquote data-quote="bettingpython" data-source="post: 1951254" data-attributes="member: 4307">I have always known that I&#039;m not the nicest or most pleasant person to be around. But I couldn&#039;t see how bad I was, it&#039;s true that you hurt the ones closest to you the worst. I just want to feel normal and happy. I am working on that now. I see my psychologist today and my therapist tomorrow. It&#039;s been almost a week since I came home from the hospital and everyone of them has seemed like a horrible challenge. I want so badly to call her and hear her voice and to talk to her about my day yesterday but I know that is the wrong thing to do right now. I hate that I can&#039;t fix this alone, I can fix myself and am going to I sure hope we get the chance to fix us in the future. My fear is that if she doesn&#039;t see me or talk to me that she will lose that love for me so I have to learn to deal with my anxiety if it doesn&#039;t work out it doesn&#039;t work.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="bettingpython, post: 1951254, member: 4307"] I have always known that I'm not the nicest or most pleasant person to be around. But I couldn't see how bad I was, it's true that you hurt the ones closest to you the worst. I just want to feel normal and happy. I am working on that now. I see my psychologist today and my therapist tomorrow. It's been almost a week since I came home from the hospital and everyone of them has seemed like a horrible challenge. I want so badly to call her and hear her voice and to talk to her about my day yesterday but I know that is the wrong thing to do right now. I hate that I can't fix this alone, I can fix myself and am going to I sure hope we get the chance to fix us in the future. My fear is that if she doesn't see me or talk to me that she will lose that love for me so I have to learn to deal with my anxiety if it doesn't work out it doesn't work. [/QUOTE]

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