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The Water Cooler
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Need advice/pointers on going sober
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<blockquote data-quote="Poke78" data-source="post: 3848479" data-attributes="member: 4333"><p>Hard truths for the OP -- I'm the son of an alcoholic who drank himself to death at age 53:</p><p></p><p>DENIAL - just the fact that you are attempting to deny that you are powerless over alcohol clearly marks you as an alcoholic. The quicker you accept that fact is one day closer to the path to recovery.</p><p></p><p>SOCIAL CROWD - Change it completely! You must separate yourself from the alcohol and others who use it in order to regain your own choices. For my father, it was hanging out at the local VFW hall (he was a WW2 veteran - a primary source of his need for alcohol, IMO). When he died and we held the graveside service, the local VFW commander was there and it was all my 18-year-old self could do to not physically assault the man. </p><p></p><p>PROGRAM - Get one! And it doesn't matter greatly what you choose, as long as it fits your needs and supports you when the weak moments come. Multiple possibilities have already been mentioned. My dad tried AA but couldn't ever admit his powerlessness over alcohol, thought he could he-man it. When he got hurt on the job, alcohol became his main "medicine" to the point where he died of alcohol poisoning with a blood alcohol level of .35%...over 4 TIMES the DUI level. </p><p></p><p>FAMILY - They need a program, too. Al-Anon for spouses, Al-a-Teen for the kids -- just a couple of possibilities. I'm sure there are others. They need to know what to expect and how to help. They also need to know they don't bear any responsibility for your choices so that they can make better choices for their own lives. But it's still going to be up to YOU -- they are not your jailer or your conscience. </p><p></p><p>Best Wishes and Good Luck with your choice for re-gaining power over your life! You have already seen that everybody in this thread are with you and want to see you succeed. Take advantage of me through a PM, if you wish. Get your relationships re-ordered so you'll have a full team with you!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Poke78, post: 3848479, member: 4333"] Hard truths for the OP -- I'm the son of an alcoholic who drank himself to death at age 53: DENIAL - just the fact that you are attempting to deny that you are powerless over alcohol clearly marks you as an alcoholic. The quicker you accept that fact is one day closer to the path to recovery. SOCIAL CROWD - Change it completely! You must separate yourself from the alcohol and others who use it in order to regain your own choices. For my father, it was hanging out at the local VFW hall (he was a WW2 veteran - a primary source of his need for alcohol, IMO). When he died and we held the graveside service, the local VFW commander was there and it was all my 18-year-old self could do to not physically assault the man. PROGRAM - Get one! And it doesn't matter greatly what you choose, as long as it fits your needs and supports you when the weak moments come. Multiple possibilities have already been mentioned. My dad tried AA but couldn't ever admit his powerlessness over alcohol, thought he could he-man it. When he got hurt on the job, alcohol became his main "medicine" to the point where he died of alcohol poisoning with a blood alcohol level of .35%...over 4 TIMES the DUI level. FAMILY - They need a program, too. Al-Anon for spouses, Al-a-Teen for the kids -- just a couple of possibilities. I'm sure there are others. They need to know what to expect and how to help. They also need to know they don't bear any responsibility for your choices so that they can make better choices for their own lives. But it's still going to be up to YOU -- they are not your jailer or your conscience. Best Wishes and Good Luck with your choice for re-gaining power over your life! You have already seen that everybody in this thread are with you and want to see you succeed. Take advantage of me through a PM, if you wish. Get your relationships re-ordered so you'll have a full team with you! [/QUOTE]
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