*massive face palm while shaking head*
*massive face palm while shaking head*
Last edited by a moderator:
[Broken External Image]
[Broken External Image]
[Broken External Image]
[Broken External Image]
[Broken External Image]
[Broken External Image]
[Broken External Image]
.
Last edited by a moderator:
Been this could be your little sister
A cowboy was sitting at the bar when an attractive lady walked up to him.
"Are you a real cowboy?" she asked.
"Well, ma'am, I was purt-near borned a-horseback, and I spend nigh on t'all of my day a-horseback punching cattle, so, yeah, you could say I'm a real cowboy."
"Wow, I've never met a real cowboy before."
"Ma'am, if it wouldn't be too forward, would you mind if'n I was to buy you a drink?"
"Yes, but I should warn you that I'm a lesbian."
The cowboy shot her a quizzical look. "Ma'am, what's a lesbian?"
She paused for a minute, then gestured towards an attractive woman at the other end of the bar. "You see that blonde down there? There's nothing I'd like more than to take her and make wild, passionate love to her."
The cowboy nods, and the lady moves on. Some time later, a couple enters the bar and walks up to the cowboy.
"Excuse me sir, but are you a real cowboy?"
With a slightly confused look he turns to them. "Well, I used to think I was. Turns out, I'm a lesbian."
"Are you a real cowboy?" she asked.
"Well, ma'am, I was purt-near borned a-horseback, and I spend nigh on t'all of my day a-horseback punching cattle, so, yeah, you could say I'm a real cowboy."
"Wow, I've never met a real cowboy before."
"Ma'am, if it wouldn't be too forward, would you mind if'n I was to buy you a drink?"
"Yes, but I should warn you that I'm a lesbian."
The cowboy shot her a quizzical look. "Ma'am, what's a lesbian?"
She paused for a minute, then gestured towards an attractive woman at the other end of the bar. "You see that blonde down there? There's nothing I'd like more than to take her and make wild, passionate love to her."
The cowboy nods, and the lady moves on. Some time later, a couple enters the bar and walks up to the cowboy.
"Excuse me sir, but are you a real cowboy?"
With a slightly confused look he turns to them. "Well, I used to think I was. Turns out, I'm a lesbian."
A Mom visits her son for dinner who lives with a girl roommate. During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty his roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between him and his roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, his son volunteered, “I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you,we are just roommates."
About a week later, his roommate came to him saying, “Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver plate. You don't suppose she took it, do you?" He said ,"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure." He sat down and wrote :
Dear Mother:
I'm not saying that you ‘did' take the silver plate from my house, I'm not saying that you ‘did not' take the silver plate But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Love,
your son.
Several days later, he received an email from his Mother which read:
Dear Son:
I'm not saying that you ‘do' sleep with your roommate, and I'm not saying that you ‘do not' sleep with her. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the silver plate by now,
under her pillow…
Love,
Mom. ♥
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between him and his roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, his son volunteered, “I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you,we are just roommates."
About a week later, his roommate came to him saying, “Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver plate. You don't suppose she took it, do you?" He said ,"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure." He sat down and wrote :
Dear Mother:
I'm not saying that you ‘did' take the silver plate from my house, I'm not saying that you ‘did not' take the silver plate But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Love,
your son.
Several days later, he received an email from his Mother which read:
Dear Son:
I'm not saying that you ‘do' sleep with your roommate, and I'm not saying that you ‘do not' sleep with her. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the silver plate by now,
under her pillow…
Love,
Mom. ♥
An English bulldog, a Great Dane and a Chihuahua are all having a drink at the bar when a beautiful female French Poodle walks in.
She approaches the three boys and says, "hey fellas, there are two loves in my life - men and liver cheese. The first one of you that can use the words 'liver' and 'cheese' creatively in a sentence, gets to take me home."
The bulldog pops off first, "I love liver cheese."
"That's not creative," the poodle exclaims.
"Well, I hate liver cheese!" spouts off the Great Dane.
"Nope, that's not creative either. Besides, your a liar," remarks the poodle.
The Chihuahua stands up on top of the bar, pushes the bulldog and Great Dane back and says...
...wait for it...
"Liver alone! Cheese mine!"
She approaches the three boys and says, "hey fellas, there are two loves in my life - men and liver cheese. The first one of you that can use the words 'liver' and 'cheese' creatively in a sentence, gets to take me home."
The bulldog pops off first, "I love liver cheese."
"That's not creative," the poodle exclaims.
"Well, I hate liver cheese!" spouts off the Great Dane.
"Nope, that's not creative either. Besides, your a liar," remarks the poodle.
The Chihuahua stands up on top of the bar, pushes the bulldog and Great Dane back and says...
...wait for it...
"Liver alone! Cheese mine!"
Similar threads
