Old Farts Official Bedlam Bash thread.

[Old Fart]

What do OSU fans call duct tape?

Sooner Chrome


A little boy runs up to his mother and says, "Mommy, Mommy, when I grow up I want to be a Sooner." And the boys Mother says...

"Come on son, you know you can't do both."


How many sooners does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One, but they get 3 credit hours for it.

Let them rip folks

 

[Zombie]

[Broken External Image]

 

[Perrone]

"Sooner be gay than a.....sooner..."

 

[Zombie]

Q: Why do University of Oklahoma fans keep their diplomas on their dashboards?

A: So they can park in handicap spaces.

What do Sooners have in common with pot? They both get smoked in bowls.


Two University of Oklahoma fans were walking down the street when they came upon a dog lying on the sidewalk licking and cleaning his groin like dogs do.

The first Oklahoma fan says to the second, "Boy, I wish I could do that."

The second Oklahoma fan replies, "Yeah, me too. But I wouldn't try it."

The first Oklahoma fan asks, "Why not?"

The second Oklahoma fan replies, "Because I'm afraid the dog might bite me."

 

[druryj]

Q: You know what the OSU grad says to the OU grad?
A: Would you like fries with that?

 

[338Shooter]

What is the difference between an OU grad and a large pizza?

Large pizza can feed a family of four.

 

[CHenry]

2 Sooners walking down a dusty dirt road when they walk up and see a sheep with his head stuck in the fence and an old farmer with his pants down around his ankles (undoubtedly a TX Longhorn) having his way with the sheep. The farmer turns to the Sooners and asks, yall want a turn? The 2 sooners look at each other, then back at the old farmer and say "sure" so they walk over and stick there heads in the fence...

 

[tntrex]

What do they call a crime ring in Norman?


A huddle

 

[Cinaet]

A guy named Bob receives a free ticket to the OU/OSU game from his company. Unfortunately, when Bob arrives at the stadium he realizes the seat is in the last row in the corner of the stadium.

About halfway through the first quarter, Bob notices an empty seat 10 rows off the field right on the 45-yard line. He decides to take a chance and makes his way through the stadium and around the security guards to the empty seat.

As he sits down, he asks the gentleman sitting next to him, "Excuse me, is anyone sitting here?" The man says no. Now, very excited to be in such a great seat for the game, Bob again inquires of the man next to him, "This is incredible! Who in their right mind would have a seat like this at the Bedlam game and not use it?

The man replies, "Well, actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she just passed away. This is the first Bedlam game we haven't been to together since we got married in 1957."

"Wow, that's really sad," says Bob, "but still, couldn't you find someone to take the seat? A relative or a close friend?"

"No," the man replies, "they're all at the funeral."

 

[Shadowrider]

Three guys are at a public restroom taking a whiz.

One guy finishes first and goes to the sink and washes his hands scrubbing really thoroughly and says "I went to the OSU School of Veterinary Medicine, they taught us to be very thorough".

The next guy finishes and and goes to wash and he washes really fast and says "I went to the University of Texas School of Law, they taught us to be very fast".

As these two guys were drying the third guy finishes up, zips up and as he walks by them foregoing the hand washing he says "I went to OU, they taught us not to piss on our hands".