^This
Praying His will for you.
Praying His will for you.
Dave,
I have gone through the same thing and I don't think sharing my experience will help you much. The only thing I know that matters in the crisis of life is Jesus Christ. Getting to know Him, learn of Him and seeing the Prince of Peace operate in your life.
He is acquainted with grief and a man of sorrows. He understands everything you are going through and loves you more than words can communicate. He loves you, your son and your wife. He is not happy either about another marriage ending.
In the end all that matters is you understanding His purpose in your life and then living that out as an a example for what really matters in front of your son.
Jesus loves ya man.
I have gone through the same thing and I don't think sharing my experience will help you much. The only thing I know that matters in the crisis of life is Jesus Christ. Getting to know Him, learn of Him and seeing the Prince of Peace operate in your life.
He is acquainted with grief and a man of sorrows. He understands everything you are going through and loves you more than words can communicate. He loves you, your son and your wife. He is not happy either about another marriage ending.
In the end all that matters is you understanding His purpose in your life and then living that out as an a example for what really matters in front of your son.
Jesus loves ya man.
You know 2 people that won custody. I raised both of my sons.
ShooterDave, mine pulled the same thing after 16 years. After the first few days of "why", the anger will set in, but don't let it win. Keep everything on an even keel, be sociable as you can to the ex, and stay off of social media with any angry rants. That and this thread will probably be the first place her lawyer will look to show why you should not have custody.
Good luck and get a good lawyer. I feel for you.
^^^^
This....definitely this.
I didn't brig it up earlier because...well, you know....*I* always assume the worst.
I won custody of both of my girls, tho' I'm not sure I fully thought that one through because now I'm stuck with two a-hole teenagers.
You guys and gals are great. I appreciate the different advice, anecdotes, and success stories. In truth, I don't know what to think about all this. I do feel a bit better today. I'm pretty sure that has something to do with all of you and you posts and pm's. I'm pretty confident that regardless of her and I, she won't try to keep my son away. Even though things are so screwed up right now, she is a reasonable person regarding issues like this. I just hope that we don't end up finding out...
I'm new here, but I went through a divorce several years back and the person who really pulled me through it was my father. He and my mother had divorced when I was around 5 years old and he had some sage words for me that no one was able to offer him. If it's gone too far to fix then its time to let it go completely.
Dad laid it out pretty rough for me while we were fishing in Mexico as my ex-wife was in court finishing the divorce process, but it got my attention. He said, "Son, the woman you loved and married doesn't exist anymore. The man she loved and married doesn't exist anymore either. You both died when you decided to part ways. You're going to need to convince yourself that she died just to get yourself past her not being around. Grieve, but don't hold a grudge. Mourn your loss, but don't let it ruin you as a man. Things don't always go the way we want them to; people grow apart, people change. Just continue being who you were raised to be, things will come around to you again. It's not the end of life, just the end of this part of it."
This was the most intense and intimate conversation my father and I have ever had. It didn't last long, but it forever changed the way I saw him as a man. I firmly believe he saved my life that day in the boat. I started sleeping better, I was actually able to keep a meal down for the first time in weeks.
I'm only 28 years old, I'm nearing my 2nd anniversary with my current wife. I'm in a better place in the world because of my experiences with my previous marriage. I wouldn't change that for anything now.
*Edit* Keep your head up. Things will get better, don't play the what if game. Asking yourself "What if I had..." only leads to more regret and more questions.
Dad laid it out pretty rough for me while we were fishing in Mexico as my ex-wife was in court finishing the divorce process, but it got my attention. He said, "Son, the woman you loved and married doesn't exist anymore. The man she loved and married doesn't exist anymore either. You both died when you decided to part ways. You're going to need to convince yourself that she died just to get yourself past her not being around. Grieve, but don't hold a grudge. Mourn your loss, but don't let it ruin you as a man. Things don't always go the way we want them to; people grow apart, people change. Just continue being who you were raised to be, things will come around to you again. It's not the end of life, just the end of this part of it."
This was the most intense and intimate conversation my father and I have ever had. It didn't last long, but it forever changed the way I saw him as a man. I firmly believe he saved my life that day in the boat. I started sleeping better, I was actually able to keep a meal down for the first time in weeks.
I'm only 28 years old, I'm nearing my 2nd anniversary with my current wife. I'm in a better place in the world because of my experiences with my previous marriage. I wouldn't change that for anything now.
*Edit* Keep your head up. Things will get better, don't play the what if game. Asking yourself "What if I had..." only leads to more regret and more questions.
I am truly sorry to hear this. I am a child of divorce and my dad was the one who walked away and basically wrote me and my two siblings off...until he got old and showed up on my doorstep needing a place to crash.
Long, sad story.
But i can tell you aren't that kind of man or father.
My hat is off to you for thinking of your son during what is about the most incredibly painful event life can hand you.
As a pastor I deal with this stuff way too much...
Hang in there. I have prayed for you and will continue to.
Blessings.
Long, sad story.
But i can tell you aren't that kind of man or father.
My hat is off to you for thinking of your son during what is about the most incredibly painful event life can hand you.
As a pastor I deal with this stuff way too much...
Hang in there. I have prayed for you and will continue to.
Blessings.
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